I’m Not Paranoid…

…but that guy, who I know is following me, might be.

Something strange is afoot.  I can feel it in my bones.  The last couple of weeks have been mighty strange.  I pride myself on being pretty intuitive, and my spidersense has been tingling like crazy.  It’s like I know the fly-swatter is on its way down and I have to decide quickly which way to jump.  How do I explain it in human terms…

Hmmm… okay, it’s like when it’s near your birthday… and you have plans to meet up with someone at their house to hangout or whatnot.  But then you start noticing that people are asking you about what you plan to do that day… people who wouldn’t normally ask you that.  And it’s not just that, but the sheer volume of people who talk to you about it.  And then when you tell them, they get this look in their eye like they already knew the answer.  So by the time you reach the front door of your friend’s house, the scrambling feet and shushing you hear coming from the other side is almost expected as you prepare to make a surprised look on your face as you open that door and hear the light switch click…

It’s like that – except not in a good way.  It’s not in a terrible way either – just strange.  It has never really bothered me in the past knowing that people talk about me – good, bad or indifferent.  The only thing that slightly bends my nose out of shape is when they make conclusions about what I am thinking.  Because most of the time they’re completely way off base.  But even there, it’s really just human nature, so I can’t blame them.  I’ve never really understood why people get so shocked and mad when they find out that people are talking about them behind their backs.  I think you’d be a fool to think that no one ever talks about you – much less talks about you in a negative light.  It’s just the way it is.  Feeling crappy about it isn’t going to solve anything.

With all this said (*and I apologize for being so cryptic) why am I writing this?  Well, if you’ve read my entries in the past, you know that I really enjoy writing about things that are somewhat amusing which happen to me on a daily basis.  This is one of them.  But to keep from being accused of doing exactly what I’m writing about, I’m leaving out names, places, and details.  I’m used to having to keep secrets… But, I’ll make you, my readers, a deal.  If things go completely awry, and the pieces go flying everywhere, and ALL of my assumptions were correct, and for some reason I have to defend myself, I’ll let you in on it.  But even then, the names will be changed to protect the innocent.

And before you go running off thinking that you’re somehow attached to this, rest assured.  If you’ve ever commented on this site, told me you read something on this site, or acted as if you’ve read something from this site – I’m most likely not talking about you.  BUT if by some chance you’ve slipped in under the radar, know this… I’m on to you… there’s no escape… let’s talk about it over a cup of coffee and a cruller.