Sweet Dreams Are Made of These

Someone asked me when my next entry would be.  I replied by asking him what I should write about.  He then said, “write about dreams.”  I think this was inspired by the sermon this morning by David Kim about dreams.  Also, later this morning I got into a lively discussion about goals and dreams with someone else who thought that people (specifically guys) who don’t have goals are quite annoying to her.  A lot of things annoy this girl, so I took that with a grain of salt.  Then later in the afternoon, I got into yet another discussion about my visions for the future.  So I figure “dreams” is a good enough topic to talk about.

I remember back in high school, I took part in this experimental class called “Options.”  It was actually very odd.  There was usually no homework, no books, no real “grading” (I guess it was just assumed that everyone would get A’s as long as they showed up).  We would work on independent projects that we would propose and present to the class in whatever field that interested us.  In the class we had a lot of discussions… about current events, politics, scientific theories, art, literature.. even controversial subjects like abortion, gay rights, creation vs. evolution… just whatever the teacher thought to talk about.

One day, the teacher told us to write down what our dreams for our future would be if there were nothing logistically hindering us… meaning, something we could do that doesn’t require us to have super-human abilities or power over the physical world.  I still remember each item on my list.

1.  Infiltrate N. Korea to find my eldest uncle and his family and somehow smuggle them out of the country.
2.  Learn to ride a motorcycle and bike around the world.
3.  Become fluent in 16 different languages
4.  Learn to fly a helicopter (this would actually help me with #1)
5.  Live alone in a cabin in the mountains and write novels which I would fax to my publisher.  On the weekends, I would go to the quaint resort village at the base of the mountain and sing with my barbershop quartet at the local pub.  (yeah, yeah, yeah, laugh it up…)

Anyway, as you can see a few things have changed.  We’ve actually had word and received a photograph of my uncle’s family.  And since it looks like reunification is inevitable, I think I will not risk international scandal and personal peril to continue with my first goal.  I still want to see the world – just not from the back of a motorcycle, perhaps… rental cars will do nicely.  I still love languages and try to learn as much as I can when I can.  I can get by in spanish, french, japanese, and korean.  I think I’ve modified my goal to learning how to say “I love you” in 16 languages.. because you never know who you’re going to meet in an airport… (totally joking).  I think I’m up to 10 right now.  The helicopter one… that’s still on the boards.  And finally… my “writing hermit on the mountain top” one… Ha!  Yeah, I guess I don’t know what I was thinking there.  Though the writing and the singing are things I still enjoy, everything else around that dream is a bit much.

So what does this illustrate?  Well, that dreams can, and often do, change.  What you think is important one moment, may completely be changed later.  Sometimes it’s over a period of years.  Sometimes it’s practically overnight.  But looking over my list, I do notice a common thread.  The desire behind them is still there, as a glowing ember, down deep inside.  As silly as the list may have been, they are reflected in what motivates me today.  Yes, some have evolved into something else, and some have just dropped off altogether… but I’m glad I made the list.  It’s something I can point to as a springboard to where I am now.

So go ahead and set your goals.  Dream your dreams.  But don’t be disappointed if the path you follow isn’t exactly the course you laid out for yourself.  I can almost guarantee that it won’t happen that way.  And even if it did – how boring would that be?  Who cares if there are bumps in the road?  If you get to your destination, you’ll forget all about them.  And even if you wind up someplace completely different, if that’s where God wanted you to be, there’s no place else you should be.  Life is not neat and orderly.

One of my favorite lines from one of my favorite movies, Parenthood – starring Steve Martin, is when the great-grandmother who is a little senile and random (kinda like me) starts to prattle about something supposedly unrelated as Steve Martin’s character is going crazy trying to get his kids under control.  Generally throughout the movie, he is very worried about every little thing that goes wrong with his kids.  He really doesn’t like the disorderly mess which is involved in being a father.  The great-grandmother, as she is exiting the house to get in the car says…

“You know, when I was nineteen, Grandpa took me on a roller coaster… I always wanted to go again. You know, it was just so interesting to me that a ride could make me so frightened, so scared, so sick, so excited, and so thrilled all together! Some didn’t like it… They went on the merry-go-round. That just goes around… Nothing… I like the roller coaster. You get more out of it.”

The mom, Karen, seeing the veiled wisdom of her words smiles and says to her husband, Gil, that he could learn a lot from her.  To which he just dismisses her rambling as just being about rollercoasters.  Then Karen replies..

Karen: I happen to LIKE the roller coaster, okay? As far as I’m concerned, your grandmother is brilliant.
Gil: Yeah if she’s so brilliant why is she sitting in our NEIGHBOR’S CAR?

So what are my dreams now?  Good question.  I still want to learn as much as I can about everything I can until I can’t.  I still want to see so much of this earth that God has given us.  I still want to feel connected to my family distant and near.  I know that music will always be a part of my life.  And I know that someday I will write something of worth to someone… be it a novel that sells millions of copies or a story to read to my kids at bedtime which they keep requesting every night until they feel they’re too old to be read stories.

There are some new ones as well.  I want a family someday to keep this old house from being so quiet all the time.  And I want them to grow up knowing the grace of God to the fullest measure.  I want to do work which has significance beyond dollars and cents.  I want to have someone 20 years from now say, “You know, something my sunday school teacher, Mr. Nathan, said one day in class really helped turn my life around to be lived for Jesus.”  I want to help bring at least one person to a saving knowledge of Christ.  And I want to marry a woman who can help me with all the above.

And one last thing…  I want to fulfill my ultimate purpose as a human being… to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.  And if ANY of the above get in the way of that one… I want to be able to let go of that dream, and let go gladly.

I’m sorry if my list is not as tangible or ambitious as what people like to hear.  I’m sorry I can’t give you a “five-year plan.”  I am where I am because God placed me here, and I’m confident that where God will put me 5 years from now will be good.  My “five-year plan” would sound ridiculous compared to His.